A Journey of Becoming

From time to time, I enjoy shamanic journeying. Entering into a meditative state through drumming, I explore other realities. In this instance, I journeyed to Lower World with the intention of meeting a teacher with a lesson or message that I need right now.

I went for a walk near the ocean and came across a gnarled old tree on a path to the beach. As I paused to look at it, I found myself sliding down through the roots. Down and down I went, then found myself in a cave with a lake. I decided to dive into the lake. I went further down through the water for some time then came out in a river. I floated in the river, over a waterfall and further on. When I finally stopped, I was surrounded by a semi-tropical forest. I climbed from the river and found a butterfly. I asked if it was my teacher. It replied that it was. I followed the butterfly through the forest until we reached a huge field full of red poppies. It stretched as far as the eye could see down away from the forest over low, gently rolling hills. In the middle of the field was a single blue flower. We approached the blue flower and the butterfly indicated that I should drink the flower’s nectar. As I did, the butterfly morphed into a colorful, winged woman.

She looked at me and said that sometimes we aren’t to know what is coming. She said now is a time to allow what I am becoming. To make space for it. To trust. Allow, trust, become. I asked her how I could let my true self out. She made a simple gesture which split me down the middle and butterflies poured out of my body. There, deep inside, was a bit of me that looked like a tiny child. I understood that this piece had been suppressed and was decaying because it was denied. She pulled it out. She reminded me that my power animal is always with me. Protecting and guiding me and that he had been with me all along.

Then I laid down in the field of poppies and caterpillars began covering me in silk threads. I felt safe, warm and comforted. I realized then that I was actually hanging from a huge tree that had been in the field all along. The caterpillars continued to wrap me in a cocoon, and I was reminded of the hanged man of the tarot. My journey companion curled up on the ground below my cocoon to watch over me.

I still had some time left so I watched from the outside as my cocoon was flooded with light. It glowed like a firefly but more constant. The I realized that there were cocoons all over the tree. A friend of mine was also being wrapped and my companion looked over and said to me, she fights. And she was, fighting the cocooning. Struggling against the transformation to come. Her guide was underneath her cocoon, patiently keeping watch, protecting her as mine was me. Then I asked my guide if I could help send light to the cocoons. In this reality, I could be both within the cocoon and watching from without. My guide replied, of course, so I began running light to both my cocoon and my friend’s. Then I put my hands to the base of the tree and added light to the whole thing. After a time, butterflies burst forth from all over the tree and flew into the air. I knew this part was yet to come.

This is when my journey came to an end. I thanked the butterfly woman, the caterpillars and my guide and went back to the river and up through the lake and then up through the roots of the tree.

The message was pretty clear…transformation is happening, my job is to allow it and trust that it will come. Afterwards I remember the butterfly woman saying that I would come out of it more glorious than I could imagine. Much as the caterpillar doesn’t know that it will become a butterfly, it just knows it’s time to cocoon.